Take it all away....

'cuz nothing matters anymore... ^(-_-)^

Funny... :P

Some hilarious stuff i read on a Facebook page...

"When a friend of mine got dumped by his girl. He told everyone:"she didn't dumped me.. we were just in

differnt places in the relationship" !

ManY failed to see that, how a relatioship can have the qualities of geographic locations. . what exactly he meant was : hE wAs LiViNg In The LiTtLe ToWn CaLLeD..

"pLz DOnT LeAvE mE"

n

ShE hAd JuSt MoVeD tO ThE IsLaNd Of

"Bubyeee" ! ''

:D :D :D

Well.... I find stupid things funny these days! ROFL!!

And it continues...

Nothing hurts more than waiting since I don’t even know what I’m waiting for anymore.

Is it a cross or the alphabet T?? :-/

Hmmm... अक्सर मैं और मेरी तन्हाई ऐसी फ़िज़ूल कि सवालों में उलझे रहते हैं! tch tch...

तुम बिन ...यह ज़िन्दगी

...thot I'd never let you go

Pearl Jam in my head!!!

Oh where oh were could my baby be... :-(

The lord took her away from me.... :-( :-(

She's gone to heaven so I've got to be good...... :-( :-( :-(

So I can see my baby when I'll leave this world........ :-( :-( :-( :-(

Live Life... Super Size!!!

हर पल में प्यार है, हर लम्हे में है ख़ुशी...

अगर इन्हें खो दो, तो यह यादें हैं...

और अगर जी लो, तो येही है ज़िन्दगी |

One of those days... when u feel life's too f**kin short to crib n cry over what u don't have!! :-)

दिल आज शायर है...

आज फिर यह आँखें नम क्यूँ हैं,

जिसे पाया ही नहीं उसे खोने का गम क्यूँ है,

तुझसे मिलके बिछड़े तोह एहसास हुआ,

कि ज़िन्दगी इतनी कम क्यूँ है... :-(

If only time could hold still...

Someone please show me the "pause" button!!

My pad...

A small place on the (n-1)th floor...

(where I leave imagination to take care of the 'n')

An apartment... For about 1 person. 2 max..but only once in a while. :-)

For someone who enjoys solitude, his friends, his movies, his books, his music and of course his food- a living room, a sleeping room and a cooking room! Would do!!

The living room. Strictly no center table! Two regular bean bags and one more..just extra large! One red :-) A 32'' plasma on the wall. A table just underneath it... Dis one serves to keep the empty coffee mugs and popcorn bowls.

Apart from hosting my Sony Hi-Fi..of course..................................

There's also a bed in the corner..on the floor. Yeah..its kinda crowded. The lighting of the whole house to be adjustable according to my mood... Dim and mellow when I am in the mood to brood over the mistakes I have made in life with may be Desert Rose blaring from my Hi-Fi and all bright when I am in the mood to take on the world... Or even strobe lights..when I am getting high to trance! :-P

A large painting on one wall ... of a smiling face probably... a wide one! Something that welcomes me back home everyday and after a bad day, reminds me that life ain't that bad after all...

Another wall..that I myself will paint to a color distinct from the rest of the room, or may be a just a strip on it..purple or burgundy I think. A huge window on another wall, which would look down on the city below... A place, where after a tiring day i can dim the lights and sit back, watch the city lights, listen to RJs blabber and sip something cold..chilled. ;-) May be doze off to the album I downloaded the previous night.

Coming to the sleeping room... There's another bed here..but fairly larger. Nothing fancy about it though... A small desk in the corner, with a comfy chair.

But the real deal with this room is that..this will host my library! No, not the whole room... But one grand bookshelf. Made of black wood. Where every single paperback I have bought from my college days will find its place... and this will continue to grow as i grow older.

Another window..or preferably a small balcony. (For coffee on a Sunday evening...)

A cooking room, with a small fridge..that has everything a man needs! ;-) (I needn't say more!) A stove and a microwave for me to cook all my favorite dishes... Chicken this and chicken that! Mmmmmmmm........ :-) And eat till heart's content.

Love my life... he he.

**1 New Message**

He wakes up in the morning, if you could call 12 noon that. Head's still heavy, he doesn't wanna spend a moment more lying there like that, but doesn't wanna get up and face reality as well. What the hell happened last night, he asks himself! How could he break someone's trust like that...? Sitting on his bed now, picks up his phone to find out..has she called or sent something? Gets disappointed and gets worried at the same time. What's she thinking??? Waits, Waits, Waits... its driving him crazy. But he decides to go on with the sunday. A bath and then some good lunch. He wouldn't be this comfortable if at some level he wasn't happy about the whole thing. Doesn't have the guts to call her and talk about it. Continues waiting...

**1 New Message**

"Had lunch? Wat u upto?"

"Hey! yep..had it. Jus lazying around. U?"

"Nothing much... been thinking alot."

That was his cue... Gotta be smart, quick and wordy now. Say something voguish and tender at the same time!

"Hmmm... Me too actually. I dunno wat 2 say gal. Have nevr been in a place like this. Don't wanna lose you now."

"Lose me?? Why wud you say something like that?"

"I dunno... My mind's not working i ges. Wat've u been thinking abt?"

"Last night! Wat else??"

"yes of course...!"

"Uhh!"

"Hey.. Don't get pissed off! I am at no better place than u..k"

"yeah yeah..."

"Wait a sec! Am i missing something here? Should i be feeling guilty??? I'm sorry!"

"Wat?? Why should you feel guilty? Wat r u talking abt?? Guilty for making me happy? Guilty for making me feel so special and feel so good? Guilty for making me feel beautiful? I was in it as much as u were, and I dont wanna feel guilty about it, about anything at all.. Please don't force me to."

This was all that he needed... She's not gonna leave him! He's releived. But what now? What does he reply back with? What? Something that she wants to hear or something that he wants to say? He was confused about what she wanted from here on. But he had no idea whatsoever about what he wanted as well...! Holds the cell phone in his hand and he's thinking hard... thinking... thinking... thinking...

**1 New Message**

"Are u there?"

"Yes, m here. Still dunno wat to say... I take back the 'sorry' though.:-)"

"Hmmm... I rele like u Je't. I rele do. I dunno where this is gong, but I wanna be with u..."

He sits back with a coke... msgs her.

"I like you too Shibi. I always have. You're my best friend... Chalo..lets have coffee. 7pm. Regular place."

********************************************

Many winters had passed since that afternoon. 7 to be precise. That conversation lost in the sands of time... Another November, another sunday. Je't, (like most his frenz had always called him) lying on the bed again at 12 noon. But this time he's been awake. For hours now... He had had a fun weekend. A routine for more than a year now. A week's hardwork and then a weekend full of friends, food, booze and blankets. They usually chose his apartment to crash after all the partying.

He lays there waiting. Watches her closed eyes twitch... He needs a definite answer today. Their relationship had blossomed over time. Had past some very tough tests of character and integrity. It had seen a cold bluish grey between the two even while living under one roof and also a warmth that even ditances of 1000s of kms couldn't dilute. He knew now, what he wanted. A life time with the one woman who makes him happy, makes him sad, makes him angry, practically makes him who he was. He once again couldn't muster the courage to ask her. Instead a long message that he took the whole night to type, was what he chose. He had sent it... Now was only waiting for her to read it.

She wakes up. N starts rushing. She's late she says... Kisses him goodbye. An exercise she never missed, even when she knew they will be away only for a few hrs! He looks on as she just drops her phone into her bag and heads out. He's impatient. Thinks he should have deleted the message from her phone while he could. But no, its late now. He waits... Waits... Waits...

**1 New Message**

His heart skips a beat!

"What is your LOVE PERCENTAGE? To find out, sms LOVE Your name & Your Partner's name to 56633. Rs3/sms."

Uuuggghhhhhhhhhh....!!!

My Magic Wand...

When you feel that everything in the world is going against you, no amount of music, chicken or chocolate can make you feel better. Its actually a very silly notion and a sillier thing to say that "nothing's going right in life!!", and i know that. But still, we get that feeling of being this insignificant thing, whom even the creator has forgotten. If such a feeling has not occured to you, then you're probably one of the lucky few... But I think it occurs to all of us. Most of us at least.

Probably one of those days for me... When I am finding it difficult to see and realize how beautiful my life actually is. How generous god has been with me in giving me sight to see the splendidness of this world, of my family and of my friends. Cant see it! Just cant..no matter how hard I try. Ever been there???

"I hate life and hate everyone around me!" my heart shouts it out! And then its echo lingers on for a long while... Actually I feel deeply hurt. And its numbing my senses, my capacity to think straight to find a solution to this pain.

(Now comes the best part...)

But then there was an enlightment. Lying on my bed, I worked out the perfect means to ease my situation. And mind you, this time it was not mindless gobbling of chocolate bars or the ever nutritiuos Complan! But some rather subtle mindgames between you and youself, where in, if you win, all pain and anguish, will look smaller and smaller... How u may ask! Please do!

Before I divulge the details of this magic wand trick to come out of any mental misery you're in, there is a Disclaimer and also a Statutory Warning!!!

Disclaimer - Works only for people who believe that they are cheats, deceitful scoundrels and hypocrites of some degree. If you've lived a life of pious fu**ing sanctity till now, then please leave this page.

Statutory Warning - Adminstering this magic wand remedy on yourself might cause some mental, emotional or physical side effect for which this site or its owner (me) do not take any responsibilty।


So here goes... When you feel down and out about something. Feel ignored. Feel "a person" is hurting you by doing something or by just not doing anything at all. Close your eyes, and go back in time. Just try and count, to how many people in life have you done something similar. Just count... Now pick one of them and start recollecting instances. Instances where you have used someone; exploited someone's feelings; turned down an honest request; ignored to acknowledge someone's existence when all he/she wanted was a smile from you; hurt someone just because you felt you could, just because you felt powerful doing it; revelled in the attention you got without once bothering to return some; abused and laughed at someone's true feelings; made someone cry and were too busy to say sorry; plainly ignored 10 missed calls and 5 messages to later say that you were with your friends... Try, try hard to feel what probably would have gone through that person's heart. How cursed and loathed you probably ended up being in his/her mind by the end of it all... This is not one of those idiotic "Chicken Soup for the ****" articles, where at the end I am going to ask you to call that person up and say sorry as its never too late... Naa..this is real life and things are a shade more complicated than that. You have wronged somebody in the past. Yes, you have done it and it can't be undone. No matter what you do. While its best to forget the past, at times like these, it might just be the right thing to think about. And realize, you have caused enough pain to others to be feeling like this today...

When you reach this stage, you're probably feeling a lot better thinking that your pain is nothing in front of what you have caused to someone else.

But if you end up feeling worse, at the end of it all... What can I say? You probably deserve it.

I was free... I was careless...

She's not some stranger you know, close though. I know her name, she knows mine (at least I hope she remembers). We had had a formal introduction some time back. Like the many many of those you have at work. There's someone new joining our department we had heard the boss say. Comes in a girl in a green salwar and a patiala. First thought in my head was "Sophisticated" and then... nothing more really. Back to my work. But just after some time, I found my mind going back to some thought. She was somewhere behind my shoulder, I turned to see. She looked as if trying to smile with tightly shut lips as another colleague tried chatting her up. A strange feeling I had right then. Hmmm... That's something new i thought. Back to work. But very soon I realised, it was all over me. And it made my situation worse, the fact that I was just not able to make sense of it all. I kept denying to myself that it was nothing about this girl. "What non sense!" I said to myself, as it hadn't even been an hour since i met her... And I had always ridiculed at the phrase "Love at first sight" and trust me I still did. I knew it was not "Luuuuv...", and this is not a Love story...

I have had my share of "Love, Sex and Dhokha" in my short but eventful life. For a long time I had truly believed that I had seen it all. Been there, done that. People who knew me closely enough would call me "Curious Case of ******** ******", which I dunno how exactly made sense other than me having had experiences ahead of my age in some funny way.

This girl more than anything else, intrigued me. Something about her, drew my mind. This vague 'something', was gonna become clearer and clearer in the days to follow.

The very first day I had noticed, she kinda kept to herself. Just like most people do when they are new in a group where everybody already is familiar with each other. But as days passed, she still kept to herself. Other than the occasional Hi Hello with a select few, she just bothered with her work.The more she stayed away from everyone, the more I wanted to talk to her... And it just kept growing.

It did not take me long to realise, what that something intriguing was... I was actually seeing myself in her. No matter how strange this sounds, but that was it. She made me feel and realise, who I actually was. A calm and quiet girl, who would get uncomfortable in a crowd, would rarely smile showing her teeth, would keep to herself no matter how long she has known the people around her, avoids eye contact as much as possible, probably fakes a phone call to get out of a room, fiddles with the cell phone to let others know she's not part of any discussion...

I watched her everyday, looked at her from far, steal a glance now and then to find out if she's looking at me. No matter how stealthily I did all of this, deep inside, I wanted her to know it all and that I couldn't stop. I also knew, even if she could read my mind and know it all, she would probably still be sitting there at her desk pretending to be oblivious to everything.

Days turned into weeks and weeks into months. For long now, I would wait for tiny opportunities to strike some conversation with her. Something small. Something more than a smile or a hi or a bye. Just something I could go back home smiling with. I didn't know what was happening to me. I hadn't felt this care free in a long time now. Careless and reckless rather. For I had surrendered myself to this feeling... Letting it take me wherever it was, making me do things that on an ordinary day I would have not! I knew it was some dangerous territory, I was treading in. Again and again, a thought came to my mind that, that I was probably pushing it too far. I found myself standing at one of those many cross roads one faces in his/her lifetime, where he/she needs to decide between doing the right thing and doing what ever under the sun your heart wants you to do. "There are no rights and wrongs", your heart tells you. "If its coming from within, If its true, If its all that the heart wants, how can ever it be wrong??". You probably could not have stopped yourself from feeling this. But its your conscience and yours alone, which decides whether you let yourself to act upon some feeling like that.
*******************************************
A monday morning it was while preparing scrambled eggs I was humming to myself, a few lines of James Blunt,

".....And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.

You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you....."

That day, I drove to my office to bid farewell to my team. I had quit the job few weeks back to land a fairly better role elsewhere. I knew it was the best thing to do... It was as right as right could be. I had a word or two with everyone. But she once again was sitting far away. I saw her looking at me, I smiled and nodded slightly. She smiled back and I left the building.

Mamta and Nitin ...A Short Story

She waited there for him pretty much everyday... Never quite admitting it obviously. The balcony where she stood over looked the busy market street of Mahatma Nagar. A narrow swirling path just about enough for a car to find its way in the crowds... It was about 6 in the evening. The bazaar jostle had just begun and so had Mamta's wait.

Her son sleeping inside, would wake up anytime now. For once she wished, that Jeetu got to see his papa as soon as he woke up. She was worried that he was growing up too fast. It's been only 7 years since she knew Nitin, she thinks. At the same street underneath, he had spotted her from the crowd below and she was standing on a similar balcony, waiting to get noticed by someone like him, not quite the Prince Charming of her dreams. But when he looked at her, all she knew that this chap was good enough for now... She was young, but had seen enough men in her life to judge this one from a distance. Was it love at first sight??? May be it was... Just meant to be like this.

7 years on... Mahatma Nagar was a changed place, after all the activity by the law makers and the so called right thinking elite of the city. The old businesses ran out of steam, some got lost in time, some just shifted base to somewhere more appropriate. But she stayed there... only moved a few blocks away from where she used to be. From where she met him.

Eventful day it had been, the night of which these two met. Nitin was promoted to become the manager of the bank, where he worked. He had worked really hard for years before that, sacrificed family, friends and fun for this day. He knew he had earned this... It made him feel euphoric. And she?? What was her story? Well... she had come to the city about 5 years back a 14 year old girl in search of work, from some village in the far east, no one really knew the name. She never said and none cared. Though she was only 19, she looked much older... he saw her, and liked her instantly. He wasn't thinking too far ahead..not 7 years into the future for sure. But who knew...?

She hears the sound of the bike from far away... She recognizes the very sound of the bike on which she had had one of the best 6 months of her life. She knew its his Bullet. She cant stop smiling. Goes and wakes up Jeet, switches on all the lights of her small 1 bed room apartment. The bike sound stops right under the balcony where she stood before. The kid is confused, still dreary eyed. The door bell rings in a while... Jeet runs to open it. And as soon as he does, Nitin lifts him up in his arms. Kisses his forehead... Still holding his office bag over the shoulder. She sees them and almost begins to cry. He reaches out to her and hugs her. They stay there like that, the three of them for sometime... This moment was gonna come only a month later. She prayed everyday that it came sooner... She waited everyday for him.

But he couldn't help her... His first love ever, he could not make her his wife. The society and the world would not have let him make a 19 year old tart his wife. She and this boy Jeet, shall always remain a night's mistake for him.

His wife was waiting for him at his house in the upmarket Lekha Nagar, they were to go shopping for the month's supplies. It was pay day after all. His real life was waiting for him.

This affection for his first love and his love child could only make him do this much..bring them money on the 1st of every month. Help them survive in their bathroom less apartment, in an area famous for its brothels till only a few years back. Where he had been brought by his friends to celebrate his promotion... Where he had fallen in love, with the girl who had been paid to make him feel good. Mamta and Nitin... This is their story.

A Perfect End to a Perfect Story...

Fast forward into the future... 12 months to be precise.

2nd April 2011.

Place: Wankhede Stadium, Mumbai

Time: Just about 15 minutes left for the clock to hit 2200hrs.

A crowd of screaming 50000+...!

They know, history is being made in front of their eyes... The dream held in every Indian's heart is coming true. India is about to bring the coveted trophy home... The world cup of cricket! Dhoni has seen it all in his career of 8 years. He has faced the wrath of media and the public, he has had stones being thrown at his house. He has seen, a country of a billion go ecstatic from the top of an open air bus in September 2007. He has seen his team rise like a phoenix in the rankings... But this is something he has never seen. History! He stands there behind the stumps, as Zaheer Khan begins his run up to bowl the last over of the World Cup Final... But who are they playing against?? And what's the equation...? Its Shane Watson on strike... And he has Michael Clarke for company in the middle. The noise in the stadium is deafening to the ears... Aussies stand at 275-4 after 49. Last over... 13 needed of 6 balls. Zak knows, its now or never...! This was his moment of redemption... He gets it right and his 1st spell of a similar final in 2003 will be forgotten forever. You see someone with her hands joined in prayer in the crowds, closed eyes, and thousands of "Orange-White-Green" waving among other things... India has not come this close to that golden ball ever. And just when you caught a breath... First Ball - Length near perfect, line could take the middle stump by surgical precision. But Watson swings across... WILLOW! He connects with equal precision! SIX over mid-wicket!!! 7 needed 0f 5 now. The crowd goes quiet... 1st six in 5 overs now! Aussies one shot away, in just claiming what has been theirs almost since forever now... Second Ball - Connects again..but wait! Its the slower one! ball lands just in front of Rohit Sharma at the boundary on leg side. They run a single. 6 of 4!!! Team meeting in the middle... Dhoni's busy talking. Third run up begins... Third ball - Same as the first, but its Michael Clarke... TIMBER!!! Stumps go flying everywhere... The crowd erupts in unison! A ship far off the coast on Marine Drive could probably hear this nation, whose faith in god was bearing results. 6 of 3 now! Its Cameron White... He knows his opponents well. His stint with Royal Challengers Bangalore lets him gage the conditions well... only one shot away! He takes guard... Fourth Ball - way outside off stump! White Swings hard... BEAT!!! Looks at Billy... yeah Billy Bowden! Was it wide?? No! says the man with the bummed index finger. The crowd erupts again!!! A little more closer to kismet... 6 of 2 needed. Zaheer collects the ball quickly from MSD and heads back to his run up point. He doesn't want White to settle down. Fifth ball... Outside off again but White knicks it!! Doni dives hard to his right... Flies for a moment probably. But the damage's done. The ball runs down to third man boundary... its Four Runs! The crowd lets out a huge sigh! And then Silence........ 2 needed of 1 ball. If India had to win this, Zak gotta beat the batsman in this one ball. He begins walking back... 1 dot ball. That's all I ask..says each soul in the country, at the stadium, on the streets of every city, TV rooms in hostels, sports bars go quiet, India knows what this means. The stadium hasn't sat down in more than an hour now, but they rise still. As he reaches the end, to begin running again... His life flashes by in his mind. Everyone on the circle! Last ball - and White Connects! But straight to Yuvraj Singh at Short mid off. They start running... Chaos! Where's Zaheer?? He isn't covering the stumps! Same scene same place..as three years back..but that was league..Punjab and Mumbai. This was the real thing... White has given it all. He will not settle for anything less than the single...Yuvi crashes into the stumps, with the ball... Where's White??? He has fallen short by miles!!! Yuvi starts running... Fielders far away know what that means. India has beaten the Aussies, to lift the 10th ICC Cricket World Cup. Fireworks shoot in the sky... You hardly hear them, cause word has reached outside! And its India this time that erupts with Joy... Cries in the crowd, Smiles, Couples kissing, Dancing... Its done. Job accomplished.

But Wait... what is the team doing? They're running the victory lap now... Flags in their hands... And who's leading them? Dhoni?? No.... Its the man, who has seen 6 world cups to reach this point. Its Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar. They lift him up at the end of the lap and now, the trophy's gleaming under the bright lights of Wankhede... Sachin is pushed up by Dhoni to collect it from the prime minister. A generation's dreams come true. To see this man, claimed to be god by some, lift the cup and take India to a place which once was only a dream. Wow!! We are the champions of the world, of the game that gives us joy, gives us sorrow. Its cries all over... All sorts of them. You can see it his eyes... He lifts it above his shoulders and looks at it and looks at the sky. How long has he waited for it. Lemme be here forever... India doesn't sleep that night. The nigh to follow, and a few nights after that... SRT announces his retirement from all forms of the game at the press conference. Its over... He has delivered what he was sent to this earth for. Happiness..unmeasurable by any means. We love you Sachin... We love you.

Dhoni goes on to sign a few more ad contracts and his story continues... Others in the Indian team become some more richer, the BCCI has pulled of what not everyone thought it could - put together a team, that commands respect and not the deep pockets.

Hope i see this day... :-) May be the day will come and go and nothing happens. But this is what would be the perfect ending to a story so perfect. I can't think of a better one... :-)